I so tried to make today a great day. And I think, for the most part, I succeeded. At least I tried, right?
It was really beautiful outside today. The weather was perfect. We even made it to the park. I had the opportunity to witness my childrens’ beautiful smiles each time they squealed with delight as they came careening down the slide. Simply put, there were a lot of smiles. It made my heart sing. Really, the experience made me feel as if being a mother was what I was created to be. But, there was just one thing missing…..daddy.
Pete’s latest chemo session came to a close yesterday when his pump was removed. He was feeling pretty good. Feeling as if he has somehow escaped those nasty side effects he felt while on the previous regimen. Unfortunately they kicked in today.
I felt so bad for him but I’m afraid I don’t know how to be the wife he needs me to be when he’s feeling sick, so I just go or do. Anything to get me out of the house and away from him. That sounds so terrible but I feel my presence just makes it awkward. Difficult. Restless. And I know what he needs more than anything is to just rest.
The purpose of this blog is to live better. To learn more and try to be more than I am. Today on the radio I was reminded of the similarities between this season of our lives and the current season we celebrate as believers in Christ. The host spoke of Easter as being a time of renewal, new life, and growth. And by being introspective that’s exactly what I intend to do. I am forever grateful that our Savior paid the price for our sins. What an amazing gift. I will be forever in His debt.