Tonight I learned of another battle lost to colon cancer. Although I didn’t know the person, I do know he was young (mid 50′s) and left behind a wife and three boys. My heart is aching for them. It’s so difficult to put into words the pain I feel for them. Their loss hits so close to home because of my husband’s diagnosis. So tonight I have decided to write his wife a letter. I don’t know much, but I know her name. Here it goes:
I feel your pain. I know your hurt. I understand your anger. I realize your frustration and I can relate to your insecurity. I know what cancer can do. I know it doesn’t seem fair and I have no words to relieve your pain. All I can do is cry with you. As tears stream down my face, I’m sure they are streaming down your’s as well. As the next few weeks are filled with preparations and saying goodbye, make sure you take the time to cry. Make sure you take the time to tell Mark how much you love him. How much you admire him for the courageous fight he put up here on this earth. Make sure you remind him that he will always be with you in spirit, despite the twists and turns of life. Make sure you take time for you, but most of all, make sure you take time to feel the presence of our loving God. I pray you would be still long enough to allow Him to wrap His arms around you. I pray you would rejoice in the fact that Mark is now where he belongs.
You are forever in my heart and in my prayers.
Although I know this letter does not do justice to their loss, these are a few things I would want to be reminded of in the event our situation took a turn for the worse. I know God is good and His plan is bigger than we’ll ever comprehend, but despite the desire to try to make sense of it all, sometimes it’s important just to be. Grieving is a complicated process but I believe being present in the moment is a good start.